Deja Vu

Well here I am again about to embark upon yet another epic trip to my beloved South Africa. After being home now for 8 months I just couldn't wait any longer. I miss Rehoboth so much, I miss my beautiful children so much, I miss my awesome friends so much and I miss a country that will always hold a special place in my heart.
Looking back over the posts I did during my 6 month stay I am reminded of how amazing God is, and how amazingly blessed I am to be able to go back. Yes, I'm only going for 3 weeks, but that doesn't matter. This time round I'm even more excited. I don't have any nerves (apart from nerves about flying), I'm just so eager to get to Durbs, get in the car, get down to Rehoboth, drive through the gates, jump out of the car and run into the arms of my kids who don't know I'm even coming (hoping it will be a nice surprise for them). My kids whom I've thought about every single day since I left. I often sit and wonder what they are up to. I can't wait to see how much they've grown in 8 months. Some, I know will be barely recognisable but in a good way. A good way because when they arrived at the village they were malnourished, covered in scabies, unbelievably unhappy and severely underweight, but now they are flourishing, they are settled, they are happy, they have literally had a fresh start at life.
That's what I think I'm looking for in a way- a fresh start. I know it sounds weird but I kind of feel like I've been in limbo for the past 8 months. Don't get me wrong I am happy in myself, I am happy in my job and I do feel very blessed but I just feel like something is missing. Because of this, I'm not sure of my future at present. I'm constantly putting off making any firm commitments as to whether I'll be effectively "setting up camp" here in the North East for the forseeable future. Something is holding me back. I feel like this trip is a chance for me to be quiet and listen. Away from the busyness of work, friends and family I can just completely relax and take time to see where I go from here and I have to say I'm rather excited by it all.
So now I've rambled on for far too long, I'm off to do the packing. I'll be updating as much as I can depending on internet availability with pictures and stories. Happy reading.

L
xx